How the mighty have plummeted uncontrollably

He led Swedish club Gothenburg (I cant do umlauts, so I'm spelling it the English way) to the Swedish treble in 1982; league, league cup and UEFA Cup. He then went to Portuguese club Benfica and won the league, the cup and finished second in the UEFA Cup. After a stint with Roma (where they won the Coppa Italia) he went back to Benfica, to win another league title and finishing second in the European Cup. He then went back to Italy to lead Sampdoria to a Coppa Italia, then won a crapload with Lazio. In 2002, he got the big job: England manager. He managed a stellar record in getting England to major championships, but could never quite pull of big-game wins. He left England in 2006, and took charge of Manchester City in 2007... that ended abruptly (mentioned in this article) . He followed that up with a stint with the Mexican national team... who politely asked him to piss off after one year at the helm. But, our favourite trooper of a Swedish manager, Sven-Goran Eriksson has landed on his feet. Oh yes, he has taken over as director of football at powerhouse club... Nottingham County.

If you're scratching your head trying to work out who Notts County are, don't be discouraged, you're not alone. Eriksson's name is probably the only one on their staff list you're likely to know. But, thanks to a takeover by a Middle Eastern conglomerate (they're taking over everything these days, aren't they? Those Middle Eastern conglomerates!) they can afford a big hitter like Sven. At any rate, Notts County were relegated last season from the First Division (one below the Championship, two below the Premier League) to the Second Division, where they will face stiff competition from Accrington Stanley, Dagenham & Redbridge, Grimsby Town, Port Vale and Rotherham United.

Notts County, whose stadium (Meadow Lane) boasts a mighty capacity of 20,300 (though most of those seats are typically empty), claim to be the oldest team in England, established in 1862... EIGHT years older than Maidenhead United FC! Damn, I thought the oldest team in the country was here. Ah well.

At any rate, Sven's really come a long way from England, hasn't he? At least the supporters of Notts County can count on their team never being picked by ability, but by fame and name. Oh wait... alright maybe Notts' teams will be picked by ability, unless you've heard of, well, any of these guys.

Oh. And Sven plans on taking them to the Premiership. I'm really excited to see how this one goes. Good thing Sven took his trusty right hand man Tord Grip with him as a "General Adviser", maybe he'll be able to keep a grip on reality for his five-year stint at the lowest point of his career before deciding to find a respectable Championship club to align himself to, or just deciding to call it quits altogether.

You've got a lot to ponder there, Sven.

75 years is a longer time than you might think

Things that happened in 1934:
- Alcatraz becomes a prison
- Flash Gordon is first published as a comic strip
- Germany signs a 10-year non-aggression pact with Poland
- Bonnie and Clyde kill two highway patrolmen in Texas a month before they're killed in a shoot-out (seriously)
- Dionne quints are born
- Hitler becomes the Führer of Germany
- The Chinese Long March begins
- Persia becomes Iran
- Jean Chrétien, Hank Aaron and Ralph Nader are born

OH - and 1934 was the last (and first) time England won an Ashes test at Lord's Cricket Ground, the official home of cricket (yes, this sentence is what that string of random events was leading up to).

Enter 2009 - the second time in the history of the Ashes (a history that began in 1882) that England managed to beat Australia at Lord's.


How I would love to tell you about the drama of the event, the edge-of-your-seat cricket taking place as the Aussies edged ever closer to beating the seemingly impossible-to-match target score set by the English. How I would love to tell you of the relief that washed Graeme Swann's face as he bowled out the last Australian. How I would love to tell you the fantastic story of Andrew Flintoff, playing in his last 5-day series, taking five Australian wickets in his last Ashes Test at Lord's. How I would love to tell you about the simple glory in England winning at Lord's. Unfortunately, I can't. I didn't get to watch it.

You see, the BBC, who has aired The Ashes for at least the past decade, decided not to pick it up this year, letting it go instead to SkySports. Now, you're probably saying, "Amrit, I didn't want to read an article about cricket, but I am anyways because there's nothing else to read. Now you're subjecting me to another TV rant? Why do you keep doing this to me? Also, can I have your autograph?"

Well, reader, yes, you can have my autograph. But this is actually important, because it proves that my theory works, and could work in the UK too! Hurrah! Assuming you were too lazy to read through the hyperlinked article, I suggested that the CBC become an opt-outable tax (yes, I am a Queen's student, I love things that are opt-outable) for having programming that lots of watchers weren't remotely interested in (oh, they're dropping The Simpsons now as well).

Now, in the UK, in order to operate your TV, you have to pay an annual £142.50 (approx. $280) TV licensing fee, which is used to fund the BBC. For that, the BBC offers commercial-free programming which is supposed to strike the fancy of all its veiwers, while maintaining strong cultural identity in what it shows. And is there anything more British than (a) cricket and (b) competition with the Australians? I mean really, the British define themselves by sport and sporting accomplisments, and getting one over the Australians is about the only thing that could make a gentryman crack a smile (even for a second).

So while the most exciting test in the past 75 years of Ashes cricket was happening at Lord's... I was either watching The Open or any array of home makeover shows (they're interesting, don't hate). Meanwhile, that most interesting of cricket matches was happening on SkySports, a cable channel which costs anywhere from £16.50/month to £35.50/month.

And thus, the BBC has put British TV-watchers (sports fans specifically) in much the same situation as the CBC for Canadians. You pay taxes for TV you don't want to watch, while you pay extra to get the cable channels to watch the TV you do want to watch. I pray you governments, let people opt out! Let people choose to watch what they want to watch! Don't hold us subject to the whims of stuffed shirts sitting in their ivory tower of television! We beg of you a system of television which reflects the wishes of the people! (Okay, I might be getting a little too dramatic here). But seriously, that £16.50/month for SkySports (£198/year) wouldn't be so daunting if the TV license wasn't being forced on people. Allow people to opt out of the BBC, allow people to opt out of the CBC, and I can promise you a vast improvement in the quality and type of programming that would be on offer. And no more crap like Little Mosque on the Prairie.

Hello-o-o-o-o-o!

Well... as hiatuses (hiatii?) go, this was one hell of a long one. But we can explain! I promise. I was doing a summer school program at Queen's castle in Herstmonceux (would recommend it to anyone who was pondering doing it), Phil's doing something important and Milway's extremely lazy.


But, I'm done my summer program, Phil remembered that he has opinions on things and Milway's still lazy, but also watching baseball, so this blog should get up and at 'em in short order.

On the docket for the near future:

I'll be talking about The Ashes cricket series between England and Australia (and will go on an Amrit-vs-CBC style rant... except about the BBC!!! DRAMA!), and who knows, maybe I'll delve into the Heatley thing... because that hasn't been done to death. Phil will be writing about the ridiculousness of the transfer window in football lately (non-Premier League too), and Milway might write something too. Who knows.

Anyways, once again - sorry for the extended break. I know all three of our readers have been pulling their hair out for months wondering where we went... well... we went to SchoolTown. Don't hate.

Expect new stuff tomorrow!

PS -- the picture. I typed "back from vacation" into Google Images and that popped up... it was so awesome I couldn't help but use it.

Football's moral high ground

Chelsea were eliminated by awful refereeing, but for them to have gone through would have been an insult to football.

Chelsea are a disgrace. They didn't try and score at the Camp Nou, and eased off too much after scoring at home. Barcelona may only have had one shot on goal last night but it's all about taking the chances you're given. There's an away goals rule for a reason, and in this respect Barcelona handily win the "moral tie" because they tried and tried and tried to play their game, and it worked. For such an expensively-assembled Chelsea team to 'park the bus' is reprehensible and ignores the fact that football is a spectator sport where enjoyment and artistic expression matter almost as much as winning.

To be fair, the referee, Tom Henning Ovrebo, robbed Chelsea of an appearance in the final, despite Abidal's red card after Anelka's clear dive. Drogba, unlike his partner in attack, was on his feet for most of the game, and earned at least two clear penalties. When he's serious and focused he is an amazing player and an asset to any team, and he was for both legs. Then he squandered all the goodwill in a few crazed minutes.

Let's give credit where credit is due: Guus Hiddink had every reason to be frustrated yesterday, but he expressed it in a civilised, gentlemanly and respectful way. Despite his attempts to control his players failing, he is still one of few to emerge with any dignity after that shambles.

John Terry gets an even greater deal of respect from me for comporting himself in a civilised way after the game. He acknowledged that Alex was booked for a foul he himself had committed, which is remarkably forthright from any footballer. After the game, did he don flip-flops and scream at the ref? No, he went to the Barcelona dressing room, shook hands with the manager and his players, congratulated them and left quietly. Drogba and Ballack can learn a thing or two from their captain and their manager.

There are a number of things that are great about football: attack, fluidity, artistry, pride. The list goes on. Two teams from the four semi-finalists showed these characteristics, and it's proof that there is a God that they are both in the final.

I hate to gloat...

...but I'm pretty happy that although my prediction for the CL Semi-Final at Old Trafford was horribly wrong, the old tactical brain is still working.

In my last post, I suggested that

you may see a strange combination of United midfielders (Anderson + Fletcher, maybe)

to counter Arsenal's relatively new tactical approach. Well, it turned out to be the case. After the match, BBC chief football writer Phil McNulty had this to say:

Anderson and Darren Fletcher were outstanding in midfield. The recent heavy-legged look had gone from United as they played at the high-tempo that suits them best.

Perhaps Sir Alex reads TINONFTSB?

Champions League Semi-Final Previews

My apologies for the long hiatus...it's been a very busy time. I felt I should share some of my thoughts on the upcoming Champions League semi-finals.

After some of the great football from the last round, there is abundant optimism for the next stage. Being used to rubbish (or in Jorge Valdano's words, "shit on a stick") from any Liverpool-Chelsea encounter, we were instead treated to a 7-5 aggregate tie between the two. Bayern Munich, the great Teutonic hope, were victims to a 45min flurry of goals in Barcelona which the Catalan club's president Joan Laporta deemed to be the best in the club's history.

Tuesday, 28 April
Barcelona v Chelsea

This one will be a treat. We should consider ourselves privileged to see this 2009 Barcelona side under Pep Guardiola the same way contemporaries were privileged to see the great Brazil side of 1970. I fell in love with Barca under the Dutchman Louis van Gaal (who, incidentally, won the Eredivisie with AZ Alkmaar last week) and Pep Guardiola's side has made me renew my vows. Daniel Alves may be less adventurous as against Almeria and Valladolid, for example, so expect Iniesta and Xavi to be more decisive, trying to find space just in front of Chelsea's makeshift back four.

Guus Hiddink, both a gentleman and master tactician (van Gaal is only one of these) threatens to rain on the Barca parade. Master of upsetting the bookies, you have to imagine that Chelsea will find some way of getting through a weak Catalan central defence. Watch out for the central midfield battle - it's all about how Essien and Lampard gel, and how Barcelona position their midfield trio to contain them. Will they play Keita? Busquets? Either way, Hiddink has plenty of answers.

Barcelona have been rampant but chased by a Real Madrid side who have won 18 of their last 19 games (in rather ugly fashion, too), and all eyes are on the decisive Clasico derby this weekend. At least one of Pep's eyes too, one would imagine. "We haven't won anything yet", is the weekly line from Guardiola, but the problem lies in deciding what to win and how.

Prediction: I think a 1-1 draw is on the cards, and don't be surprised if Chelsea make it to the final.


Wednesday, 29 April
Manchester United v Arsenal

This one has 'classic' written all over it. Keane, Vieira, van Nistelrooy and Keown may be gone, but the hunger remains.

For a neutral, to see the sensational Andriy Arshavin cup-tied for this game is a major turn-off, but this game should be a very entertaining affair. Arsenal are unbeaten in the league for over half the season and there is an aura of solidity around the side. Still, consistency has been hard to acheive and a blip is always a distinct possibility. One would favour United in the midfield battle but Fabregas's new advanced role could be tactically problematic for United. Alexandre Song, lying deep in midfield, has been a revelation this season. Watch for a tense first half dominated by the battle in the middle of the park.

United's lineups this season have been rather erratic, so who knows whether Berbatov or Tevez will get the nod? Cristiano Ronaldo is hitting form and Ryan Giggs is fresh off a PFA award win. Sir Alex Ferguson will undoubtedly have an eye on the weekend derby with Manchester City, but watch for a full-strength side. Sorry Nani, no action for you. Fabregas will exploit the space between the back four and midfield, so you may see a strange combination of United midfielders (Anderson + Fletcher, maybe) deployed to counter this threat.

Prediction: I have this one down as a 2-1 win for Arsenal against the old enemy. The game at Old Trafford the following week is probably the most unpredictable game of the season. Another Chelsea-United final may be on the cards, but don't be surprised to see Arsenal knock the prospective English champions out.

Why does the CBC insist on sucking?

I'm sorry that this is the first post we've had up in over a month. Late March and April are busy here in Kingston, we've got papers and exams coming out the wazoo.

That said, this last annoyance by the CBC is too much for me to bear. I know I seem to have it out for the CBC, and jump on every dumb thing they do to make my argument more cogent... and that's mostly because I do.

Last year, the CBC did something called "Test the Nation: Sports". It was this wonderful little trivia thing where people printed off an answer sheet and watched the show and circled the correct answer on their answer sheet. Such fun! CBC win! Look at those smiling faces of Ron McLean and Wendy Mesley, they know they're doing a good thing!


For the past few weeks they've been advertising doing it again, and I was pretty excited. It was scheduled to be Sunday, April 11 at 7pm. So last night rolled around and a buddy of mine came over and we printed off the sheets again and plopped down in front of the TV.

It seemed a little suspicious that I remembered a lot of the celebrity guests from last year, but figured they just got the same people back, no big deal. Then I felt like I remembered some of the jokes at the start, but decided that I'd watched enough Hockey Night in Canada that I've come to predict Ron McLean's jokes. Then the questions started... and things started to feel a little fishy, like I'd done this before.

Then I looked at the bottom of the answer sheet, and it said "May 25th at 8pm!". Then the commercial break ended and, for 2 seconds, the words "Pre-Aired Programming" popped up on the screen. And my heart immediately sunk.

Don't tell me you couldn't come up with FIFTY more questions!!! Don't tell me you were so lazy you couldn't even be bothered to change the daggum date on the answer sheet! What is wrong with the CBC!? Why are they so set on losing all their sports viewers?

Other than Don Cherry and Ron McLean, Hockey Night in Canada took a nosedive this year. They're dropping all baseball coverage. They're dropping their CONCACAF Champion's League coverage, and knocking back (if not dropping altogether) figure skating, skiing, aquatics and world athletics.

I've put up the CBC's mandate multiple times, so I'm not going to do it again. Refer back to here if you want to read it again.

I understand the economic times are tough, and the CBC's been forced to cut back heavily. But it seems sports are shouldering most of the burden. While they spend the money to bring in Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy and keep making that rubbish Little Mosque on the Prairie, we're losing the chance to see real Canadians compete in sports that, as Greg put so well over at Out of Left Field, "may not be sexy to beer companies or generate the same kind of knee-jerk lunacy that infects Canada like a sickness every four years during Winter Olympics hockey games".

The fact that the CBC couldn't even be bothered to come up with 50 more questions was pathetic, and really rubbed in the point that they couldn't care less about the sports-watching Canadian public.

I've said it before and I'll say it again - the CBC isn't accountable for the programming decisions they make and, as such, can cut and pay for whatever they please. This while Canadians are forced to pay for it through their taxes. Make the CBC opt-outable, and I tell you what they'll figure it out really quickly.

As for right now, I'm still stewing about the lack of Test the Nation. Thanks CBC, you ruined my celebration of Jesus coming back.