Tuesday, July 22, 2008

The straw that broke the camel's back

In this metaphor (in case you couldn't work it out) - I am the camel and my back is playing the part of my patience. Oh, and if anyone calls me a camel, prepare to be spat on à la El Hadji Diouf. The straw, of course, is the important part of the metaphor because odds are (unless you're cheating and reading ahead - in which case stop that!) you haven't got a clue what I'm talking about. Now I forget what I'm talking about. Oh wait, yeah, the straw. The straw is Mike Milbury being hired by the Ceeb - the pile is the CBC. And, as many of you already know, as far as the CBC goes, I think of it as a pile most of the time.

Mike Milbury is absolute rubbish. He seems to have absolutely no concept of a good interview or good hockey analysis. He was crap on NHL on NBC, so apparently it makes perfect sense for him to move to the most-watched hockey broadcast in the world!!! I don't understand it at all. He has a tendency to analyze out of personal preference rather than by actually watching what's going on in front of him. The teams and players he likes can do no wrong, and he'll defend them to the death against his other co-hosts, no matter their offense. He has no concept of how to argue his points in a reasonable manner* - as displayed in the video link I stole from Barry Melrose Rocks. Beyond that - he's been shit in every job he's ever had in-and-around hockey** (I'm not sure how good a bagger he was at Big Bubba's Fish Emporium in Brighton, MA but I'm sure he was shit at that too)***.

Even Big Don will lay a verbal h-whoopin' on his favourite players and beloved Bruins when he thinks they shit the bed. Milbury is the height of annoyance, and now he's on Satellite Hotstove!?!? The one where they give sober analysis of what's happening in-game and around the league? WHAT!?!

The CBC has done an absolutely fantastic job of irreparably fucking up their hockey coverage in three short months, after years of mismanagement and arrogance. While CTV/TSN/Sportsnet have slowly and quietly started pulling sports coverage out from under the CBC, their basic assumption seems to be "we're the CBC, people will watch us anyway". Not the case, O foolish CBC, not the case at all.

Mind you, I will certainly flip the channels over to see Ron'n'Don, but other than that, our relationship is over. The CBC and I are casual now, after a long-term committed relationship. We'll be F-buddies, if you will. I'll continue to watch the good stuff on HNiC, but, unless there's a really good game on, I'll be watching the brunt of my hockey elsewhere.

* Note some of his brilliant quotes showing off his analytical prowess on his Wikipedia page
** After visiting his Wikipedia page, I rescind my comment and admit that he was a decent coach for that one year...
*** I'm pretty sure there's no place called Big Bubba's Fish Emporium, and if there is I doubt it's in Massachusetts, but still...

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